“Mujhe lagta hai meri kamai par mera haq hi nahin hai” (I feel I
do not have right over my earning) A 30 year old woman came to know the reason
for her financial blockage. She said she earned for few years prior to marriage
and her parents took all her earning. She said, Dr.Vandana, post marriage, my husband
wants me to earn money, money and money. He thinks he has total right over my
earning. With so much hard work put in to earn money I am always left without
money. What did I do in my past life that people expect only money from me.
Session…..
It is evening. I am sitting. My clothes are poor man’s clothes.
I had a Kiryana shop which I had to close. Now I work on my small piece of
land. I somehow meet my basic needs. I am getting physically weak. My daughter
is now young and I am 40. I borrowed money from a man (my husband in present
life) for her marriage. My daughter is married now.
It is cold night. I sleep outside the house. I do not have good
relationship with my wife because I do not have peace of mind. I could return
very small amount of borrowed money back to the man. His son is sick and he is
in urgent need of money for his son’s treatment. He tries to arrange money from
elsewhere but did not succeed. I want to return but have no money. I feel very
helpless. His son dies. I feel very guilty. I feel I am the cause of his
sorrow.
My health is not good. I have breathing problem. I can’t eat
much. I am 57. I always think, how I can
return his money. I will not be at peace till I return whole money. I carry lot
of guilt. I am the cause of his sorrow and loss of his money. Now I cannot even
eat. I die in the evening on the cot outside the house. My wife is with me. I
am cremated. My last thought was I could not return his money. I had a lot of
burden and guilt on mind. Lesson learnt “Apni chadar dekh kar paaer pasaro”.[spend
according to your capacity].Guided towards light, in light when asked for
forgiveness from the man, answer came- I cannot forgive you. I lost my money
and my son due to you.
Reorientation……..
Now I understand the reason of the type of relationship with my
husband and my financial blockage. This understanding is giving me peace. Now I
will not think I am victim of circumstances. My perception about money issue is
totally changed. In this present life I am repaying karma. Thank you very much
doctor….. This experience opened my eyes.
