PLR Session......
I am a white woman in my early twenties. I have a loving family. I am happy and ready to explore. I am saying good bye to my family before leaving for my assignment, a major incident in my life. I also say good bye to a young man whom I love but I tell myself I would be with him when I come back and would have enough time.
It is afternoon. I reach a mosque. It is prayer time. A huge gathering of men are performing Namaaz. I am here on an assignment, maybe a documentary or some research. There is a bearded man without moustache wearing a turban looking at me. I am scared and hide under a shelf, waiting to run away from this man. I ran away and got lost in a place of low dry mountains. I am captured by some men; one amongst them is the guy I ran away from. I am in Afghanistan.
I am held in captivity, my hands tied around my wrists. I am raped by men. I ask for my death every minute. It is a strange feeling, I have the body but there is no soul, or maybe my soul is numb. I feel I am alive yet dead. I am physically, mentally and emotionally numb. I do not even feel the physical pain, the cold, the hunger anymore.
I manage to loosen up the ropes around my wrists. I snatch away the dagger from the bearded man’s waist and stab myself in chest and my stomach. I died after few days due to the wounds and infection, a lonely painful death. My soul just wanted to get over with this life, a taxing life indeed. They left my body there. I want to rest.
Lesson learnt is that being fearless and independent is good but one needs to be cautious too. I also learnt being ambitious and loving one’s career or choices is good but family, love and relationships should also be given due priority.
Reorientation.....
I keep myself and my career above love and family. One of my biggest fears in this life has been of losing my mom or family members when I am not with them. Now I know where it comes from. I also fear dying a lonely death which has been a repeated pattern in my soul journey and I needed to release this block. The connection to my present life is that even in this life I have been keeping family and love on hold thinking I have enough time to go back to them but the truth is family and love is to be our highest priority, life needs to be balanced, one should draw a line for everything and one should give time to all 3- 4 important life components........................I can very well connect this life to my present life.
Thank you Dr.Vandana for you invaluable help , guidance and support...I should go now, have so much to do to get my family together and make my soulmate to take the step...Good luck to all!!
